Monday

Times I've Been Terrified

1. Tracy, Jenny, Jenny's friend Erin, and I were once chased by a bull (horns and all) across a field.
2. I've also been chased by a gaggle of geese. Once at Centennial Country Club, but I was in a cart, so I narrowly escaped. The other time I was lying on the ground (!) at Des Peres Park and got pecked a bit.
3. Seeing my baby sister floating under water with her arms raised for help at my aunt and uncle's neighborhood pool when she was about 3. My dad had to jump in to rescue her.
4. My friend Tasha and I were chased from the city pool to her dad's body shop by a man saying, "girls...girls...girls..." over and over.
5. Some of my guy "friends" (I have to put it in quotes because no actual friend would do this to you) tried to break into my rental house in college wearing black robes and Scream masks. I almost peed my pants.
6. A guy (I think he was drunk and trying to get into the wrong apartment) tried getting into my house once when my roommate was gone. He worked at that key for about 20 minutes. I hid behind the couch against the wall with my cell phone and woke up there the next morning.
7. Spinning and sliding all over I-40 at 3:30 in the morning on the way home from a late shift at Abercrombie in college during an ice storm.
8. When I thought I was having a heart attack a few years ago. After a trip to the ER, it was discovered I had costochondritis. So painful.
9. I was in one of my friends houses in college, and a small cat jumped onto the top of my arm, clawed itself in, and started hissing. I was shaking my arm violently and screaming, but it stayed on there. I hate cats.
10. When this (apparently cracked-out) lady got mad at me for going the correct way up the parking garage at Culinaria while she was flying down the wrong way and got out of her car and yelled profanities while hitting my window demanding I get out and let her beat me up. I did not get out, clearly.

3 comments:

  1. Okay I'm sorry but for most of those I could not stop laughing. I have never been terrified like that ever. Still laughing please FORGIVE ME.

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  2. (Andy said)

    Don't forget the time I secretly invited Jenny to surprise you on your birthday... She come in the house when I was taking Puddy out and ran to jump in bed with you and you freaked out!

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  3. I know - that (Andy's suggestion) should have made the list for sure!

    This list cracked me up. I don't know how you always manage to have the BEST stories. And did you consider calling 911 when the guy was trying to get in your apt?

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